hOnest aPe » moving pictures

J.R., I am your father..

Ape — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 02:44:47 +0000

Have you ever seen a grown man naked, Elmo?

Ape — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 00:52:51 +0000

Cute and cuddly rapist and murderer on the loose!

Ape — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 12:43:22 +0000

Without God, how could R&B singers ever win an Emmy?

Ape — Sat, 14 Mar 2009 15:11:14 +0000

Who’s got the sweetest disposition?

Ape — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 02:11:18 +0000

Here, to brighten your day (or night), are four of my favorite Donald Duck cartoons. If you’ve never seen classic Disney shorts before, you’re missing out. Modern Disney shorts are about as enjoyable as getting the business end of a trident shoved in your genitals. CLASSIC Disney shorts, on the other hand, are like….you know…NOT getting the business end of a trident shoved in your genitals. Damn. I need to work on my similes. Whatever. Enjoy these wonderful bits of animation. Or words to that effect.

Jesus and the Vikings vs. The Alien Dragon

Ape — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 04:01:04 +0000

Holy shit. Holy. Fucking. Shit. If the movie doesn’t deliver on the trailer I will be seriously pissed.

When Milk Attacks!

Ape — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 17:48:42 +0000

For your viewing pleasure, I now provide you with the videos that have been making me laugh lately. Some you will have seen. Some may be new to you.

Either way, put down the milk before you watch them. I will not be responsible for nasodairyal expulsion.

When Lizards Attack!

When Bugs Attack!

When Bugs Attack II!

When Grapes Attack!

When Last Names Attack!

When Frosting Guns Attack!

How to break up with a woman, by Danny McBride

Ape — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 23:46:19 +0000

What’s Happening?

Ape — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 16:57:58 +0000

Talk about a colossal fail. M. Night Shyamalan’s latest film, the Happening, recently made its way to DVD. And, for some stupid reason, we thought it might be enjoyable. I mean, the trailer was pretty cool, right? People killing themselves en masse, for no reason? Intriguing. Unfortunately, the movie fails to deliver on any level. Any level except the one where things suck so bad you want someone to stab you in the leg with a fork to distract you. And Mark Wahlberg, an actor who I usually enjoy (especially in the excellent Shooter), was so horrid I felt myself wishing that M. Night had cast someone like Carrot Top in the main role. Retarded he may be, but he would have done better than Wahlberg. Hands-down. Anyway. Avoid this fucking film like the plague. Unless you want a good laugh. Then you’d totally love it.

Handsome Man vs. The Pipe Wrench Men

Ape — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 01:29:15 +0000

This here awesome shit was sent to me by Kelvin. That boy knows him some funny.