Honest Ape

Both Kelvin and Paloo sent this gem my way. It pretty much speaks for itself.

You might not know this,
but Adolph Hitler loved cats.
Cute, Jew-hating cats.
What the hell’s the point
of visible pilots with
invisible jets?
Wait, don’t wear that shirt.
Sure, it matches your pants, but..
I jerked off on it.

“…..Democrats want to get us out of Iraq, but they can’t wait to get us into Darfur. There are two reasons. What color is the skin of the people in Darfur? It’s black. And who do the Democrats really need to keep voting for them? If they lose a significant percentage of this voting block, [...]

I just realized that Boo-Berry is clearly the ghost of a drunk. Look at him. Wavy and shaky, dopey eyes. Still wearing the same clothes for breakfast that he was wearing for dinner. The signs are all there. And clearly the berries in the logo are nothing more than alcohol bubbles. Poor dead alcoholic.

I have a hard time believing that something called the “Emergency Gorilla-Protection Force” exists. But it does. So, I imagine a real-world Justice League is just around the corner…
EGPF, Deploy!

Okay, web-heads**, show of hands - who here thinks your grandmother is cooler than mine? Well, if you raised your hand, you’re both wrong and stupid. I mean, who raises their hands when no one else is around? Dumb.
In any case, my grandmother is cooler than all of your grandmothers put together. [...]

Maybe it’s my sick mind, maybe it’s coincidence. But maybe, just maybe, the people who made Oblivion are some perverted geeks.
I’ve been playing Oblivion a lot lately and doing a lot of work on making potions as I go through the game. It’s because of this that I pay particular notice to what alchemical items [...]

I woke up this morning and realized I had no idea what day it was. I racked my brain, and still couldn’t come up with it. Not until I looked at my PC’s calendar did I figure out it was Sunday.
This led me to figure out the following mathematical formula: Dc + U = ∞A